Life isn’t about consistent happiness and positivity because we’re all here to learn and the lows are there to teach us a lot. Sharing the wisdom she gained since her spiritual awakening, Lucy Jane Bainbridge joins Tesa Baum in this positive exchange of energy. Lucy is a messaging and marketing mentor for spiritual entrepreneurs. She helps soul-based entrepreneurs find their own spiritual awakening and translate that into their messages. To Lucy, the zigzag of life is inevitable. Tune in as she talks about her one great zigzag that culminated in her moment of epiphany at age 26.
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The Spiritual Awakening Of A Messaging And Marketing Mentor With Lucy Jane Bainbridge
In this episode, I am going to be speaking to Lucy Jane Bainbridge. Lucy is a messaging and marketing mentor for spiritual entrepreneurs. She offers high-level marketing with less stress and more soul. She helps soul-centered business owners uncover the goal inside them to create powerful and authentic messaging that speaks to their people, grow their online presence, and naturally convert followers into clients. Lucy and I dive deep into some of the challenges she faced in her life and some of the magic that turned her life around. I’m excited for you to read about her.
Lucy, how are you?
I’m fine. Thanks for having me on here.
Thanks for coming on. As you know, we’re talking about the whole zigzag theme and I wanted to hear if you want to share any particular story or anything that you feel is meaningful when it comes to the zigzag of life?
When you explain what the zigzag means, the way I took it when we first spoke about it was probably the zigzag is inevitable. Life isn’t about consistent happiness, consistent positivity, and this ideal utopia where that’s the goal with no other deviation from happiness, achievement, and consistent success. Everybody knows that but we, in our minds, get caught up thinking that we should be aiming for that consistent happiness.
[bctt tweet=”You have to think about what people want and not what you want to share.” via=”no”]
If we would somehow, someway, someday get to that point where it’s smooth sailing, to me, that’s not what seems to be the purpose of this existence. If that was the case, you’d have all these people that say, “Yes, you can get to that,” but that isn’t how it is. The zigzag is going to show up in many different ways. To me, it seems that we’re here to learn. The closest person that talks about this reminded me of Neale Donald Walsch. There’s a little children’s book that talks about the little soul in the sun. Do you know it?
No, I don’t. I have to take a look.
He talks about how the little soul is this angel in heaven. She wants to know herself but she can’t know herself because there’s no opposite to her. He puts her on Earth and he says, “You are the light.” She’s like, “What’s light?” To know light, you have to know dark. This is the whole purpose. When you say zigzag, that’s what zigzag means to me. We cannot have these opposing parts of our journey. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have any contrast. We wouldn’t have anything to compare anything to.
I always look at it from a perspective. While you’re struggling, while you’re on a down or a pause, you get frustrated. If you know that this is the pattern and you know this is the game, you can sit in it differently and understand that this is the process of learning. I love the way you worded that. It’s true.
My path has become easier to bounce back from those lows. I suppose there are different zigzags. My zigzag is every day. There are zigzags in terms of the life story.
Raising children, especially we’re home more. You get overwhelmed. Do you have an impactful zigzag story, one specific story that you could share with us?
If you want to see it as a zigzag, to me, it seems like one great zigzag is probably the beginning of my life and then until I had a spiritual awakening when I was 26. Any point before that seems like one great big low in a way even though I’ve had other lows. I had lows after giving birth. There was a huge post-traumatic stress thing. I suppose my level of consciousness completely changed. I’m quite unrecognizable to what I was when I was younger. I suppose the beginning of my life wasn’t so bad and then zagged down. If you were to look at it, it’s negative and positive. I grew up in a standard middle-class with good parents. Dad worked in the city. Mom worked part-time. It was normal.
You had a roof over your head. You had a loving family.
There was drama with my father and that’s part of the story. The biggest thing was I looked completely different from what I used to look like. I had this thing called an underbite where the bottom jaw sat in front of the top jaw. It was prominent but it wasn’t weird. No one would spot it if you walk past them in the street. What happened was I started to get bullied about it from a young age. That majorly impacted me. I was bullied when I was about probably nine. It got intense between the ages of 13 and 17.
When I was seventeen, I had an operation on my jaw. My face completely changed. It was all these boys at school that picked on me. Some girls as well but it was mainly these groups of boys. I’m saying that the whole area where I lived, every group of boys would interlink and they all picked on me. They called me names walking down the street. There was no group of friends that I had that didn’t have this set of boys that would pick on me. I was consistently bullied for such a long period of time. My self-esteem was on the floor.
Drinking and taking drugs was an escape but it also changed me into much more confident. The thing was, it wasn’t the way I looked. There would have been other people that may have looked like that and got picked on but they had more resilience around it or they would have backtracked it more. I used to freeze. My reaction to it would perpetuate it. I never got taught to punch someone in the face, which I wish that someone told me to go and punch somebody in the face.
When I got picked on, I would not let anybody bother me or my younger sister. I was tough that way.
I wasn’t. That was the way I was brought up. Also, I was brought up that way because I was an only child. There was this whole set-up. From an early age, I had this idea there was something wrong with me that I wasn’t worthy, I wasn’t capable, I wasn’t funny enough and smart enough.
Were you feeling invisible?
No. It was more small and weak. It wasn’t invisible because they would pick on me.
It would have been better if you were invisible.
I had this operation and they didn’t recognize me. One boy started chatting me up. He had used to pick on me. We were in a fairground and he came over to me and started talking to me because I looked completely different. Most people don’t get that. In a way, that’s a huge blessing. The surface didn’t change. Yes, I had this huge high from that and this huge lift. I’d look in the mirror and I was like, “This is amazing.” I suppose it’s like winning the lottery or something. I couldn’t sleep because I was amazed that I was pretty. I was beautiful. I’ve aged because of the drinking and stuff like that.
At that age, I was a pretty girl. I could have done modeling. It was like, “No.” It was then like, “Okay.” My confidence didn’t change. I still had this worthless feeling underneath and that’s the point. These little surface things can change but the fundamental and psychological patterns were still in there. Drinking and drugs were still my only way of connecting with people. It was my only way of losing any fear and seeing myself on a level. It made me feel connected. I was heavily addicted. I couldn’t get out of my cocaine addiction. It went on and on. I went out with many men that were dealing drugs. It was a pathway that I was not able to get off. Cocaine is an active drug. On my 26th birthday, I was reading The Secret. It’s cliché. I might change it.
I know, The Secret. All these books are coming to the forefront.
I wish it wasn’t that book but it was in 2012. This was when I was 26. It all shifted in 2012. I was reading the book and I had been on a three-day cocaine binge on my birthday. I hadn’t slept. My come down used to be awful. It’s the worst come down. I would feel soulless and evil. There was no way I was going to have a natural high. The point is it wasn’t the book. It was some kind of transmission from something that was being said and I had this huge freaking realization. I woke up to the fact that I saw a thought. I had the first experience of my inner nature versus identity. Now I can see it like that because I’ve done so much self-exploration. At the time, it seemed like it was the book and what the book was saying but it wasn’t because it’s manifesting. The book was about manifesting things. It wasn’t that I was like, “Yes, I can have what I want.”
You felt something empowered you. You have the choice to create. It’s what I feel about the creation. We are creators.
I realized the power on some level. I saw a thought for what it was. I got how life was being decided between two different people. I woke up to the facts of that. It was such a strong experience. The colors looked brighter in the room. I woke up to my hands. I jumped out of bed. That stopped my cocaine addiction completely.
That’s the moment. It’s that higher knowing that does that shift. That was it. You were born again.
It took me on a completely different path. It changed everything. I stopped smoking. My mom got diagnosed with stage four lung cancer.
My mom passed the same way.
It happened before that. It’s the weirdest thing. It was intense. I bounded down the stairs. I tried to relay what was happening to my boyfriend at the time.
[bctt tweet=”To know light, you have to know dark.” via=”no”]
I understand everything you’re saying. It’s interesting that you’re bringing up your mother because what I’m getting is you are handed the baton. Your higher self and her higher self. She’s like, “It’s time to grow up. I’m not going to be here anymore.” We lost our parents when we were young. My dad is still around. There is a difference when you lose them young. You grow up a lot quicker.
I looked after her. I was her carer. I don’t know what I would have done. How could I have continued my cocaine addiction at the same time as doing something like that? I don’t know how.
You had to get healthy first to support her.
That took a psychological change. It wouldn’t have even been about the cocaine, even though I couldn’t get off the cocaine. That was a major player in the problem. There was no space for anything else apart from this cocaine. My body was so controlled by that. This shift needed to happen because it completely shifted my whole identity.
You did become a different person.
I didn’t want it anymore.
It is beautiful to hear your story. Physically, you went through a transformation. It does show us that we are not physical beings. It had to be a spiritual awakening. You had to sync up spiritually and physically to transform. This is such a beautiful example of that. I look at you as amused in many ways. There are certain people that you can talk to. We’ve never physically met one another. It’s only virtually, which is this call.
You do have a sense that somebody can get in there with you. You may not have any idea sometimes but you’re a beautiful writer. You can beautifully connect with your clients. Anyone that’s coming up with an idea, for some interesting way, I feel you do connect in a higher place. You’re connecting with people in heaven. You’re sitting with them and writing in a different way. You do not necessarily see it from a practical perspective. You do go someplace else.
Maybe I do. It’s interesting what you’re saying to me. Thank you. I’ve never had a compliment like that. That’s a meaningful compliment. You’re not just saying. You call it what it’s really like. It’s meaningful to me. I don’t know that about myself.
We all look for a transformation. We all want to evolve. We all want to be better. There are certain people that it’s not moving. There are certain people you can talk to and you’re like, “We’re not going anywhere.” Other people you can talk to, you’re like, “We’ve gone to many different experiences. We could fly.”
It does do something for you. You start to go back to real life. I’d have low moments. I’ve been depressed on the surface. At that point, it’s like I’ve lost all humans. I’m a freaking psychopath.
The whole zigzag of life. It’s not all beautiful, celestial, amazingness where we want to go to the highest vibration. We do get lost. We’re humans, so the emotions take over. Sometimes we find those escapes, whether or not it’s with bad behavior. I have teenagers. I want them to want to have good behavior. I want to make sure that they have good habits and strive to be the best they can be, exercising and eating healthy. It’s tough sometimes when you have kids. They don’t think of the long-term game.
It was like saying that you can’t have your arm anymore. There’s no point without it. There’s nothing else. I didn’t understand that I could feel a connection without that because I hadn’t had it. There’s no point because that’s the only way I feel a certain way. How are you going to tell me that I can’t have that anymore? Even though it made me feel horrendous as well but it was that high. Once you’ve gone to highs like that, it’s not just from cocaine but with mushrooms. There are other drugs that take you high and you get a feeling and experience real-life. They remove the layers. You’re aware that happens but then you can’t get back there. The facts of that mean that it’s hard to believe that you can touch that in any other way but I know you can. Most people don’t get that.
That’s why I love spirituality. A lot of the practices where I’m getting from many indigenous cultures, the journeying, the drumming, I feel we can go to that zone. We do enjoy our imagination and spirit comes in and gives us messages. I do not need to be consuming anything. I know you have tried ayahuasca. I want to ask you about that. To me, plant medicines are always interesting. If we explore, we can find out so much. I did a meditation years ago and I was connecting to many different plants because they communicate with us. I did a cacao ceremony, which was incredible.
I’d love to do that. I like cacao.
Me, too. I’ll give you the information about the company. They are delicious. The flavors are great. The ayahuasca spoke to me and I did notice that the floor was opening up and it was like a suction cup going down. This is before I learned anything about its medicinal purposes, the cleaning and the cleansing. I’m like, “The ayahuasca communicated with me.” We can communicate and it’s a reciprocal sacred exchange. When we consume or when we drink the cacao, it’s that relationship. It’s not all consumption. I was a smoker until my 30s. Luckily, I stopped at 30 when I met my husband. The consumption, that’s the balance you learned. Everything then comes into perspective. You don’t need to put that into you constantly. You can trust that you can stand on your own two feet.
There’s another source of enjoyment and pleasure. For me, that is often reading spiritual texts and that’s meditation, journaling, working, and writing. It’s funny you say that about my writing. There’s so much resistance towards writing even though I do it. I know I can do it well and I resist it but that’s normal for writers. You can’t sit down and do a bit of working out or something. Some people can’t get to the gym. It’s like, “Why don’t I do this all the time? Why am I not doing it every day?” You then don’t do it again.
I feel like it’s enjoying the ritual. When you create a ritual, it’s like a declaration and then you create an intention and then the energy unfolds after that.
You have two different mindsets.
Creating that sacred space is difficult. We discussed working out of our home versus working in another space. When you have children at home, it’s difficult to have that sacred space.
The four walls remind you of that and your stuff is everywhere. I’m going to a buzzier place where I’ve left the house. Even if it means moving and getting in the car and walking to the café, all of that starts the energy to flow. Whereas if I’ve dropped him off and then I come home. Sometimes I could sit and eat more food and then watch something. You can’t even move after that.
You lose all desire. May I ask you about ayahuasca or any other plant medicines? I love discussing it and knowing what your awakening was. I know a lot of people that are interested in it.
Mushrooms are similar. I did both. For the mushrooms, I did it as a recreational drug when I was younger. That’s the drug that I would take without question. I would create space for that. Most drugs, I wouldn’t do them again. They’re negative. Mushrooms, the same as ayahuasca, I can see where you could go off and have a psychotic. If you’re not in the right space and the right environment, it could be a bad trip. They take you to what reality is more like versus changing you chemically. They enhance you and clear the blocks, unlike alcohol, cocaine, and ecstasy.
All those new drugs like Melissa.
They’re synthetic. It’s a fine line. It’s my own experience. I have had bad experiences with mushrooms and acid and stuff. For me, you don’t come down. There’s not that low. I’ve never had a low for mushrooms. I’ve never not been able to sleep.
You know what’s helping your body.
You don’t get hungover from it. You’ll never have that experience. For me, that’s like a sign. This thing can be ingested in me and it’s not going to impact. It only takes me to a higher place. I don’t get the after-effects, whereas with alcohol, smoking, and anything else you get low. It impacts your body in a bad style.
You know it’s toxic. I will never have a soda again. I don’t remember the last time I had soda. I’m like, “I will not put anything unhealthy in my system.” However, I drink a lot of kombuchas. It’s a carbonated drink. Too much of a good thing isn’t so good either.
I don’t think it’s the little things. If you’re addicted enough, you use it as an addiction. I don’t think it’s fair to have some ice cream sometimes.
I agree with you. We need the pleasure. Lucy, I want to wrap it up. I want to ask you, is there anything that’s going on in the world on your end that you want to share?
Patterns come up to me as little themes. It makes me think of new programs. I’ve created a new program, which is going full circle from what I used to do. I now help people with social media and marketing and communicating. It’s less about the strategy but more to do with the messaging and the communication. I call it the marriage between your unfiltered soul and the client’s desires. Yes, it needs to be your message channeled through you. The way to filter that slightly is to match it to what somebody wants and then that creates that harmony where people will want to buy from you and then you get paid for what you do. A lot of healers and spiritual teachers have a lot to give but they don’t understand how to communicate that necessarily.
Especially coming off of the cacao ceremony, it’s all about this reciprocal exchange. We don’t know what we want to receive. We’ve been talking about it. When you are delivering your message, a lot of times we are trying to communicate, explain and giving instead of connecting with who you’re talking to.
With the receptive of somebody else’s mind.
That is the energetic exchange. That’s something to think about. Everything is energy. We can’t give it all up.
It’s taking it from the form and putting it into words in a way that someone will value. That’s how I see it. You’re valuing it because you’re making it clear. You’re giving it context. You’re giving it grounding. You’re taking it from the non-tangible and putting it into the tangible world. That creates this clear communication.
Synergy. I see the energy coming full circle. It’s like that infinity sign. Now it’s starting to move. There are many people that are trying to market themselves and it’s me, me.
It’s a lot of preach. You’re not honoring it. This isn’t to say change everything about it but people don’t give it its light of day. They sell themselves short because they don’t think, “How is this going to be helpful? How do you give this to another person?” Think about why people buy stuff. It’s all right if it’s for free. Even for free, why does someone want to give that person the attention? Those words are not about you. They’re not lost. You want to make sure that you’re serving somebody else and serving their pain and their desires. I learned this when I was a teacher. I knew stuff and started telling people it but I didn’t break it down enough. I had to learn how to break down stuff enough for people to understand.
That is key. With so much that I’ve learned over the years, I want to share it. Sometimes information can be an overload.
You already have so many assumptions and things you’ve understood underneath what you’re sharing that people don’t necessarily have. A perfect example of this, which I use all the time is when you’re teaching a kid what the number seven means. You can’t write the seven on the wall. You’ve learned that. It’s two lines. You’ve got to mirror an image of what you know what seven means. The word seven, the squiggle seven. Language is fine but you need to show what seven means to a kid. The way you teach seven is you have seven cupcakes, seven balls, seven shoes. That has to be embedded into their consciousness before they can write seven and even understand what that is. It’s two black lines.
I try to help people do that with this spiritual message. Once you’ve gone to a certain level, it stays up there. You’re trying to transmit it from that place but you’re not breaking it down into a real context like a normal person who’s not in your world doesn’t necessarily understand that. How would you get them to even listen to you? You have to think about what they want and not what you want to share. You have to think, “How do you bridge that?”
This all comes full circle for me. We all want to reach the highest place. Sometimes with communication, it will be simple. It is the energy. Anything that’s coming up that you’re offering and you’d like to share?
I’m doing a class, which is all about irresistible messaging and becoming a soulmate client magnet to the people who want to work with and who they want to work with. That’s about messaging. I work with people on that level. I’ve also got another program coming out called Worthy, which is all about this being good enough and releasing those stories of not being good, which is about releasing your whole identity and seeing that your identity is not who you are. That’s for women who are making tiny little changes and never getting anywhere they want with their relationships and their money or business because they’re attached to the stories about who they are and it’s possible or not possible for them as a person. It’s called Worthy.
It is pulling off the layers and being happy with ourselves.
[bctt tweet=”If you imagine a monster in your mind, you’re not going to think about that monster because you’ve thought about it once.” via=”no”]
You can be a different person. You can choose not to have that in your life anymore because you can evaporate it into consciousness. It doesn’t have to be a story anymore. It doesn’t have to be part of you. If you imagine a monster in your mind, you’re not going to think about that monster because you’ve thought about it once. You’re not going to make it who you are because you thought of a monster. That’s as fleeting as it needs to be but because we’re so attached to the stories, they become our reality. We’re attached but they’re not there.
I understand what you’re saying. I like the way you’re wording it. I love the image of evaporating. If we think that we have something limiting us, we could evaporate it. It’s energy. It’s not that real.
It all keeps coming back because you keep blowing life into it. We create it but we don’t know that. I’m not a master. I’ve still got my blind spots but that’s the power of having these circles in these programs. Other people can shine a light on this ship for you without you having to even know what your blind spots are.
I do love any type of circle because we all pick up on each other’s stories. I was doing meditation with a group of people. I had an image that came on to me and it was like a skin thing, skin hardening, and spots all over the arm. I’m like, “This means nothing to me.” When we all shared in the circle, one woman was bringing up how her brother who passed away from AIDS came to her mind and I’m like, “I must have picked up on that story.” We can help each other. The more we come together and connect, we can bounce off and see our lives differently.
You rise. Also, that’s just not my story. Everyone has a version of that story. You then start to see that everybody’s got that on some level.
There’s no shame. Let go of that feeling of shame.
It’s not even personal to you. It’s not a personal thing anymore. It’s like, “That’s a universal issue that comes up in everyone’s mind.” You think it’s yours, “It’s my issue. I can fix it. I need to fix it.”
I love how you help people shed so much and then rise as you said. Lucy, thank you. I’m happy we had this time together to chat.
Me, too. I always love talking to you. Thank you so much for having me. You’re doing such a good job here sharing this work with people.
About Lucy Jane Bainbridge
I help women release old unwanted habits, activate their own inner bliss pharmacy and show them how to master their energy in relationships so they can have who and what they want.
After being catapulted out of a life of emotional pain, addiction and toxic relationships when I was 26, I became a certified Clarity Coach and was committed to helping people transcend their own psychological demons.
Having struggled with confidence issues from an early age due to years of bullying, one of the areas dear to my heart is helping people see through their ‘not enough’ and ‘I’m broken’ stories and realise their true magnetic power.
My methodology is a mixture of breath work, science-based education, a spiritual understanding.
Through courses, group programs and 1:1 coaching I’ve helped women quit binge-eating, change their relationship with alcohol, stop obsessively worrying, feel secure in their romantic partnerships, take huge leaps in their business and much more…
Clients come away feeling empowered, confident and excited about the future. You can see what others have said HERE.
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